Warriors of God
by krissy7490
Summary: Based on the original spoiler pics and clips of 5x04. Don't read if you don't want to be spoiled! My version of what I thought would happen and then what I wanted to have happen! ; Is Dean/Castiel. Don't like slash, don't read!
1. Chapter 1

Warriors of God

This was inspired by the promo pics for Episode 4 of Season 5. If you don't want to be spoiled then I would wait to read this after you see the episode. Granted, I don't even really know what's going to happen in the episode other than what the description says.

Also, this is going to be a Dean/Castiel story. Sort of. Well, you'll see when you read it. Sorry. It's what my brain came up with. *shrug*

So this may have more chapters if people request it. My goal is to have it done before the episode airs, however, so keep that in mind! This ain't going to be a 40 chapter story! (Watch, I say that and you people will get me on chapter 100! Lol!)

**Disclaimer:** Supernatural is not mine. If it were, well, there would be less clothes, more shower scenes, and waaaaaay more smut between Dean and Cas because, well, I could! : ) So that also means Dean and Castiel aren't mine. I'm just borrowing them to play with!

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Chapter 1

The air was rank with the smell of putrid rotting garbage and flesh. The streets were littered with debris and abandoned, broken down cars. Some of the cars had sat there so long that vegetation had sprouted in the seats. The rundown buildings were covered in colored graffiti, some of the pictures and writing dulled with time and sun. The windows were barred and boarded up, the glass broken.

There were no signs of life.

Then a door opened.

Four people emerged from the building, armed to the hilt. Three men and a woman. The woman was attractive with dark hair pulled back in a pony tail and dark eyes. She carried her weapon confidently, carefully surveying her surroundings with skilled practice. One of the men was an older gentleman with salt-and-pepper hair. While the woman was watching the ground level he was carefully watching the rooftops. The second man had dark hair and blue eyes. His face wore several days growth of a beard. He also was surveying at ground level, but also keeping a close eye on the leader of their group.

The leader was a tall handsome young man with light brown hair and green eyes. He carried a rifle and had a pistol strapped to his leg. His face was set in concentrated focus, his eyes staring straight ahead. He knew he didn't have to worry about anything coming up behind them. He knew his companions would alert him if anything tried.

"Nothing yet, Dean," the bearded man said quietly to the leader.

Dean nodded, his gaze never wavering. "They'll be here, Cas. They're just waiting for the right moment. They're watching us now."

Cas nodded, his grip on his weapon tightening slightly as his gaze swept across several buildings.

The group fell silent once more as they continued down the road. Soon Dean could see their goal in the distance. A dilapidated building built of brick. The sign identifying what it was had been destroyed long ago, probably when the Plague had first began. Dean clenched his jaw, hoping beyond hope that what they needed would be in there. That maybe this time they would finally catch a break.

They were one hundred yards from the building when the crunch of glass breaking under a boot from down an alley caused them to all freeze. They all instinctively turned towards the sound and at first saw nothing. Clicks of safeties being shut off filled the air and their weapons were all pointed at the alley.

Time froze. They waited with baited breath.

Suddenly, a strangled roar echoed down the alley and something charged out of the darkness. It was a man, or what appeared to be a man. His face was smeared with dried blood and his eyes were wild with frenzy. He charged the group with his arms raised, ready to attack. The woman fired, shooting the man in the head. Blood and bits of brain and skull sprayed through the back of his head and splattered on the wall behind him. He collapsed lifelessly to the ground.

It was too late. It was as if he had been the signal because suddenly two more frenzied people leaped out from behind an abandoned bus in front of the group. Then five more came out from another alley on their right. The fighters began firing upon the zombies, but it soon became clear that they were outnumbered as more zombies began appearing.

"Get back to the base!" Dean yelled as he slammed another clip in his rifle. "GO!"

The older man and woman began running back the way they had come, firing at the zombies in front of them. Cas remained close to Dean's side as they began running back. They were able to clear a path back to their base, killing zombies as they went. They were almost there.

The ground beneath them was cracked and heaved from years of neglect. Dean didn't see the small chunk of missing sidewalk and he stepped in it. His ankle twisted and cracked painfully causing him to cry out and fall to the ground. Cas's eyes widened with horror at the sound of Dean's cry. He turned around and rushed to Dean's side.

"Dean!" He yelled frantically, dropping to his knee next to him.

Dean clutched his ankle and gritted his teeth with pain. Both men could see how Dean's foot was twisted in an odd angle.

"It's broken," Dean ground out.

"Come on," Cas said, trying to help Dean to his feet.

Dean looked back at the zombie hoards approaching. He swallowed hard, forcing himself to make a difficult and painful decision. He pushed Cas away and shook his head.

"No! You need to run!"

Cas stared at him and shock and shook his head. "No! I'm not leaving you!"

Dean fired and killed another zombie while Cas took out two more.

"There's too many and you can't make it with me!" Dean yelled furiously. "You know the plans! Run! I can take care of myself!"

Cas looked around desperately at the growing crowd of zombies. Tears welled up in his eyes. He knew that Dean was making the most logical decision and that he was right about both of them not being able to make it. But he also knew what would happen if he left Dean here.

"Please… don't ask me to…"

Dean swallowed hard, trying to fight back his own tears.

"You have to leave me, Castiel! You know it! One of us has to live through this!" He pushed Castiel away again. "RUN!"

The tears began rolling freely down Castiel's cheeks. He took a deep breath and grabbed Dean's hand.

"I'll always love you," Castiel whispered through his tears.

Dean smiled sadly and nodded. "I know, Cas. I'll always love you too."

Using every ounce of effort he had left in him Castiel forced himself to let go of Dean's hand and rise to his feet. Shooting as many zombies as he could in order to clear a path to the base he forced himself to run. He finally made it to the door and allowed himself one last look at Dean. The man had made it to his feet and was balancing himself on one foot and had made it over to one of the buildings and was leaning against it.

"Come and get me you sons of bitches!" Dean yelled triumphantly as he shot the zombies around him.

That was the last Castiel saw of him before he was pulled inside and the door was shut.

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Well that was fun to write! And that all came from just one of the pictures! You can see it if you check out my Twitter profile! : )

So what did you think? More? Yes? No? Feedback most definitely welcome on this one! Don't be shy!

Thanks for reading!


	2. Chapter 2

Spoiler Warning! Well, if you're reading this you're getting spoiled anyways so I doubt you care very much. But, anyways, the phone call between Dean and Castiel came from the recent spoiler clip. I definitely recommend watching it before reading this because it's waaaaay funnier to watch! You can find it on YouTube: Supernatural 5x04 - The End Clip 01 : )

Anyway, hope you enjoy it!

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Chapter 2

Dean Winchester was used to crappy days. Being a hunter you tend to have more crappy days than good days. And, at this stage in his life, Dean was pretty sure he had encountered every crappy day one could have. These included his mother dying in a fire caused by a demon, his father dying because he sold his soul for him, his brother dying because of the demon that killed their mother, and then, finally, being torn to shreds by hellhounds and dragged into the bowels of Hell. OK, there isn't really much else to top that one for crappy days. Oh, wait. Knowing that you started the Apocalypse definitely ranks right up there as at least Crappy Day #2.

So Dean knew crappy days. And while today wasn't quite up there on the scale, it had quickly ranked in his Top 20. It began with a phone call from his brother, Sam. Sam wanted to reconcile, wanted to prove to Dean that he had really turned over a new leaf this time. That he acknowledged his past mistakes involving the demon blood and now knew he didn't need it anymore or want it. He wanted to hunt with Dean again.

Unfortunately, Dean was tired. And hurt. He knew Sam meant what he said, he could hear it in his brother's voice, but Dean couldn't get past all of the pain Sam had caused him. He had watched Sam walk away from him too many times before. He had been hurt by Sam too many times before. And he didn't want to get hurt. Not again.

So he had said no. He said that he just wasn't ready yet and Sam would just have to give him some more time. It had hurt to say it and Dean knew that it hurt Sam to hear it, but Dean wouldn't back down. It wouldn't be fair to either of them if he did.

Then came the phone call from Castiel regarding the Colt. It was certainly unexpected, but leave it to Castiel to make it entertaining! Well, at least his phone call had made Dean's day a little less crap-tastic. He couldn't help but admit to himself just how cute he found Castiel when the angel was desperately trying so hard to figure out human things. And the cell phone was definitely one of them.

"WHAT!?" Castiel had yelled through the phone into Dean's ear. Dean could hear a large truck rumble by in the background and he had to hold the phone away for a minute so Castiel wouldn't hear him start giggling like a little kid. "Wha- Dean?"

Dean could hear the frustration in Castiel's voice and while he felt bad that Castiel was having such a hard time, well, it was pretty damn funny!

"I didn't-… I didn't get that," Castiel said finally after the truck had gone by. Now Dean couldn't help his snickers.

"You know, it's kind of funny talking to a messenger of God on a cell phone. It's like watching a Hell's Angel ride a moped."

Apparently Castiel really wasn't seeing the humor in this situation.

"This isn't funny, Dean!" Castiel snapped back, his tone very anxious. "The voice says I'm almost out of minutes!"

"OK! Alright!" Dean replied, although he actually thought this was quite funny and had several quips on the tip of his tongue regarding the "Voice," but decided it wouldn't be so funny if Castiel ran out of minutes before he knew where Dean was. He made a mental note to give Castiel some money and teach him how to put minutes on his phone next time he got the chance. "I'm telling you, Cas, the Mook's have melted the gun down by now."

"Well, I hear differently," Castiel retorted confidently. "And if it's true… and if you are still set on the _insane_ task of killing the devil then this is how we do it."

Dean sat wearily on his bed. "OK. Where do we start?"

"Where are you now?"

"Kansas City…" Dean looked around and grabbed the key ring for his room that had the motel's name and room number on it. "Century Hotel, Room 113."

"I'll be there immediately."

Dean inwardly groaned. "Whoa whoa whoa! No no, come on, man! I just drove 16 hours straight! OK? I'm human! I've got stuff I've got to do!"

"What stuff?" Dean could hear the skepticism in Castiel's voice.

"Eat, for example. And in this case, sleep! I just need, like, four hours once in awhile, OK?"

"Yes," Came Castiel's reply.

"OK, so then you can pop in tomorrow morning ."

"Yes," Came the reply again.

Dean looked at the phone wearily and flipped it shut before Castiel could say anything else. He enjoyed the angel, he really did. But sometimes he wished he understood human needs a little bit better and know when things like breaks were needed.

He sighed and got up. He decided he should grab something to drink for morning since he knew Castiel would be there at the crack of dawn. He went outside of his motel room to the soda machine, trying to clear his mind so he would be able to sleep later on. He was digging through his change when he felt a light breeze and heard a voice behind him.

"Hello, Dean."

Nearly jumping out of his skin Dean spun around to see the source of the voice. He groaned in disgust when he saw the figure standing there.

"Oh God, not you!" Dean said in annoyance.

Zachariah smiled politely and took a step forward. "It's good to see you again, Dean," he replied, ignoring Dean's tone.

Dean shook his head furiously and began backing up.

"Get the hell away from me, asshole," Dean growled furiously. "How the hell did you manage to find me?"

"Oh, it was easy really. I just tracked your phone call from Castiel."

_Figures_. "Well, after the shit you pulled last time you can forget ever getting my help. I'm not letting some other asshole angel use me as his meatsuit, got it? Besides, I saw what happens afterwards and there's no way I'm gonna spend the rest of my life like that! So just go away and leave me the hell alone!" He spun around and began walking back to his room.

He heard Zachariah sigh heavily behind him. "Dean, I don't believe you fully understand what is at stake here."

"I understand just fine!" Dean snapped back.

He had just reached his door when he jumped in surprise as Zachariah suddenly appeared in front of him, leaning calmly on the door.

"No," Zachariah said calmly. "I really don't believe you do. Because you, Dean, are a man who needs to see the facts laid out in front of you for you to believe it. I don't think you can truly comprehend what effect your decision is going to have on all of mankind in the years to come."

Dean huffed out an annoyed sigh and rolled his eyes. "And what the hell is that suppose to mean?"

Zachariah smiled knowingly. "It means this," he said and reached out and touched Dean's forehead with two fingers.

Dean didn't even get a chance to respond.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

The change from nighttime to daylight blinded him monetarily. Dean rubbed his eyes, and blinked several times as his eyes adjusted. Finally, he could see, but he honestly couldn't believe his eyes.

He was standing in the middle of a deserted road in the middle of a deserted town. The buildings around him were dilapidated and boarded up. They looked like no one had set foot in them for years. The roadway was littered with abandoned cars and debris, none of the cars looked like they were even possibly capable of running. There was a foul odor in the air, a mixture of decaying garbage and rotting flesh. Dean was all too familiar with both smells.

"Zach, you son of a bitch! Where they hell am I?" Dean muttered furiously under his breath.

He began walking down the road, looking around for any possible signs of life. He couldn't believe how completely silent it was, there wasn't even a breeze to rustle the garbage or undergrowth on the ground. He could hear his heart beat loudly in his ears, even though after years of hunting he knew how to stay calm in any given situation.

Although this situation… well… this was different. There was something in the air that gave Dean chills, and he knew something was definitely really really wrong. Just what that something was, though, he had no idea.

He was passing an alleyway when he spotted a figure kneeling on the ground. When he looked closer he realized that it was a little girl. She wore a faded and tattered dress. She was bent over pieces of a broken mirror and there was a ragged teddy bear nearby. Dean took a deep breath and approached her cautiously, not wanting to scare her off.

"Hey there!" Dean called to her in what he hoped was his most friendly tone. To his surprise, though, the little girl didn't even look up.

"Hello?" Dean said, getting a little closer and speaking a little bit louder. "Hey, I was wondering if you could tell me where I am."

The little girl still didn't look up. Her choppy haircut hung over her face, hiding it from Dean's view.

"Are you hurt?" Dean asked, his protective instinct kicking in. Still nothing.

He moved slowly to her side and knelt down, a friendly smile on his face. "You know the whole 'not talking thing' is kind of creepy, right?" He said jokingly.

That's when he saw a gob of bloody spit drop onto the broken shards of mirror in front of her. Before he could react she turned to look at him. He instantly saw a wild, feral look in her eyes. She let out a screech and swung at him using one of the shards of mirror, cutting his arm slightly. He managed to jump back far enough not to suffer more serious injury and quickly swung and hit her in the head. The blow knocked her to the ground and rendered her unconscious.

He let out a hiss of pain and turned to look behind him to make sure nothing else was going to jump out at him.

And that's when he saw it.

Scrolled in large, blood red letters on a wall at the end of the alley was one word. _Croatoan._

_Why is that familiar?_ Dean thought to himself. Then he remembered the town. And the word.

"Oh crap," Dean whispered.

And it quickly became apparent that his luck wasn't about to change. Suddenly a group of people began walking by and in front of the words scrawled on the wall. Their clothes were dirty and tattered like the little girl's and Dean had a sinking suspicion that these people were also infected with the virus as well.

Dean had really good instincts.

The group stopped for a moment and stared at him carefully, as if sizing him up. Dean guessed there were at least twenty of them and he didn't stand a snowball's chance in Hell against them.

So he ran.

And he heard them give chase behind him.

He tore out of the alley, knocking over a garbage can in the process, but not slowing down for a second. He ran as fast as he could down the street and he knew that the group was not far behind him. He knew from years of training not to turn around to see where they were, that it would only make him slow down and possibly fall over something. He knew he couldn't afford to stop for even a second. There was no way he could take on that many of them, especially as he remembered what that virus had done to that other town. He zigzagged through the debris, hoping it would slow his pursuers down.

Dean turned and barreled down another road. It was too late, though when he realized it was a dead end. A large chain link fence barricaded the road and it was padlocked shut. He looked up, hoping that maybe he could scale it, but saw the top had razor-wire lining it.

He was trapped.

_I'm gonna die. Again._

He turned and saw that the group had stopped running. They were now slowly walking towards him and Dean knew it was because they knew he had no way of escaping. His heart thundered in his chest and the blood roared in his veins.

_If I somehow live through this I am so gonna kill Zach._

The group was beginning to close in. Dean stood ready to fight, refusing to allow himself to go down easy. He knew it wouldn't be long, but his pride wouldn't let him do otherwise.

Suddenly a shot rang out. One of the zombies fell to the ground, much to Dean's amazement. Two more shots rang out and two more zombies fell.

"DEAN!!! THIS WAY! RUN!!!"

Dean spun around at the sound of his name. He then spotted two people standing in and open doorway, a man and a woman. The man had been the one to call to him and both of them were rapidly firing at the zombies. Dean decided he really didn't care how they knew his name but he didn't know them. He rapidly deduced that he had a hell of a better shot surviving with them then with the zombies. He quickly began running for the door.

He heard the group behind him roar with anger and move towards him, but they were quickly falling under the man and woman's gun fire. As soon as he reached the door Dean dove inside and slid across the floor like he was sliding in to home base. He heard the door get shut behind him and when he turned he saw the couple quickly begin boarding it up. He heard the zombies outside pound on the door, but could easily see there was no way they'd be getting in.

Staggering to his feet, Dean could see he was in a dimly lit hallway. The wallpaper was old and faded and beginning to peel from the wall. The only light source came from two lanterns sitting nearby. He could also see a small arsenal of weapons propped up against the wall, ready to go.

_God, this is becoming one really weird day, _Dean thought with amazement.

Suddenly he was being crushed in a warm hug by the woman who had helped rescue him. When Dean looked down at her he could see the tears shining in her eyes.

"Dean… we've been so worried about you! When you didn't show up… after what happened yesterday… we had begun to think the worst!"

"Cas told us you'd be back," the man said walking and patting Dean warmly on the back. "He said he knew you'd figure a way out of that mess!"

_What the hell…?_

"Yeah," Dean said weakly, smiling slightly. "Yeah. And thanks for your help back there."

"Don't mention it, boss," the man said, smiling broadly. "You know Jean and I will always have you back!"

Jean nodded, smiling happily as she wiped away her tears.

"God, listen to me and Jack here go on! We need to get you back to Cas! He has been worried sick about you!"

"Yeah," Dean said nodding. _Yes! Take me to Cas! Maybe he can explain to me what the hell is going on around here!_ "I have some stuff I need to talk to him about."

He followed the couple down the darkened hallway. As they passed open doors he could see various groups of people sitting around, some talking, some eating, some sleeping. Those that noticed him visibly brightened and began talking excitedly to the others with them. Dean wondered how these people all seemed to know him, but figured he'd get his answers when he talked to Castiel.

As they approached a brightly lit room at the end of the hallway Jean dropped back next to Dean and put her hand on his arm.

"He's been pretty torn up since you went missing," she said in a low voice. "You know how he gets sometimes. We tried to get him to lay off the drinking, told him it wouldn't help, but you know there's no reasoning with him when he gets in those states."

_Cas is __**drinking**__!? _Dean practically had to bite his tongue off not to say something to that.

They stopped a few feet from the door and both Jean and Jack looked at Dean with smiles.

"Go on ahead, sir," Jack said with a wave of his hand. "I'm sure you want to have some privacy."

_Smart guy_, Dean thought. "Yeah, thanks."

Dean began walking forward and stopped in the doorway. What he saw made his jaw drop.

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Yup. Stopping it here because I'm evil! Lol!

You won't have to wait long, I promise! : )


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 4

Dean stared at the figure sitting on the floor. It had taken a moment to even recognize the man as Castiel. For one, Dean had never actually seen him wear anything besides his usual suit and trench coat, even during his time as Jimmy Novak. This Castiel wore a light grey shirt and dark pants and… sandals? And the Castiel he knew always was clean shaven. This one looked like he hadn't seen a razor in several days. The only similarities Dean could see between this Castiel and the one he knew were his piercing blue eyes and his tussled dark hair. Dean was pretty sure that would never change on the angel.

Of course, he had also never seen Castiel look as despondent as he did now. Castiel sat in a circle with several women, a glass bottle of some sort of alcohol sitting next to him. His face was buried in his hands and one of the women sitting next to him had her arm comfortingly around him.

"It's OK, Cas," the woman cooed gently. "Dean has been through worse situations. He'll be OK."

Castiel shook his head, not looking up.

"I should never have left him!" he whimpered, his voice slurred from the alcohol. "I should have stayed with him!"

The women looked on sympathetically while the first woman rubbed his back soothingly.

"You did what you had to, Cas. He told you to go and you did. You were following orders."

Castiel shook his head miserably. "It was my job to protect him… It's always been my job to keep him safe… and I failed him…"

He reached over and picked something up off the floor next to him. It took Dean a moment to realize just what it was, but when he did he nearly fell over. Castiel took a long, slow drag off the joint, closing his eyes as he held the smoke in for a minute before expelling the smoke into the air.

_I have been dropped in the freaking Twilight Zone! That's it! There is no other explanation for it!_

This was completely and totally wrong in every sense of the word for Dean. It was bad enough seeing Castiel this distraught, but to see him drinking _and_ doing drugs! It made Dean almost feel sick and he was really wondering what the hell had happened to make Castiel like this.

The girls were now huddled around Castiel, hugging him and reassuring him that everything would be alright. Then one of the girls looked up at the doorway and spotted Dean. Her eyes widened and her jaw dropped in shock.

"DEAN!" she squealed as she jumped up and ran over, wrapping her arms around him in a huge embrace.

The rest of the group looked up in shock. A chorus of joyful screams filled the air as the girls rushed over to Dean and nearly knocked him over as they welcomed him with hugs and a few kisses on the cheek.

_OK. Well, this part isn't so bad, _Dean thought to himself.

He looked over at Castiel. The angel was still sitting on the floor, as if frozen. Dean could see the tears that had welled up in Castiel's blue eyes. The girls immediately noticed where Dean was looking and they quickly began making their exit. The one girl who had been comforting Castiel gave Dean's arm a gentle squeeze and she smiled warmly at him.

"I'm glad you're safe, Dean," she said before disappearing down the hallway.

Dean watched her go before turning back around. Castiel still hadn't moved, his expression still that of shock. Taking a deep breath Dean stepped into the room and closed the door behind him. He knew this probably wasn't going to be an easy conversation he was about to have and he didn't want the whole building to hear them.

"Hey, Cas," Dean said, trying to smile like nothing was wrong.

Castiel slowly staggered to his feet, his efforts hindered by the alcohol and pot he had smoked. He slowly walked over to Dean and reached out to touch Dean's cheek.

"Dean?" Castiel whispered in awe.

"Yeah… well… look, Cas, we-"

His words were cut off as Castiel pulled the hunter into his arms and buried his face into Dean's neck. Dean could feel Castiel's body tremble as he sobbed.

"I'm sorry, Dean… I'm so sorry! I didn't want to leave you! I thought I would never see you again!"

This was not going to be easy. "It's OK, Cas. Really. Come on; look at me for a minute."

Castiel slowly pulled back enough to look at Dean's face. Dean felt his stomach tighten as he saw something in Castiel's eyes that he had never seen before. Something besides the guilt that he knew the angel was feeling…

Suddenly, Castiel shoved Dean against the closed door and kissed him passionately on the lips. Dean froze, too shocked to register fully what was happening. Castiel ran his hands down Dean's chest to his waist, pulling him in closer to him. As Castiel's tongue tried to gain entry into Dean's mouth, Dean's brain finally kicked in, causing him to react. He shoved Castiel away with full force and stared at him in shock.

"WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT!?" Dean yelled.

Castiel stared at Dean, his face full of shock and confusion.

"What…? I don't understand…"

"YOU _KISSED ME!_"

Castiel looked even more confused.

"But… but I always kiss you…"

Dean shook his head emphatically.

"No! NO! You do _not_ always kiss me! You have never kissed me in the year that I have known you!"

Now Castiel looked even more baffled.

"But… Dean… I've known you for six years…"

His voice trailed off. Dean stared at him, not knowing what to say. He could see Castiel sobering up right before his eyes.

"You're not Dean…" Castiel said quietly.

Dean shook his head slowly. "No… well… I am Dean… but I'm not the Dean you know…"

Castiel dropped his gaze and Dean could see his hurt expression. He felt guilty about it, but he had to know what was going on.

"Cas… hey… look, I don't know where the hell I am. One minute I'm at my hotel getting a soda and the next that douchebag, Zachariah, zaps my ass here!"

"Zachariah?" Castiel asked quietly.

"Yeah. I had talked to you earlier. You still acted, well, like you. And we were talking and you were using your cell phone. We were talking about the Colt and how I didn't think it was still around."

Castiel's brow furrowed as he concentrated on Dean's words, then a look of realization crossed his face.

"Dean… that was, like, five years ago!"

Even though Dean had secretly suspected something like that, he couldn't help but close his eyes and groan.

"So… it's what year?"

"2014."

"Son of a bitch!" He opened his eyes and looked at Castiel. "So what the hell is all this? Where are we?"

Castiel dropped his gaze and turned away. He sat back down where he had been sitting before and reached for the bottle of alcohol sitting nearby. Dean quickly swooped in and grabbed it.

"Oh no you don't!" Dean said as he grabbed the bottle and the joint that was also sitting there. "I need you sober and not stoned, Cas! Why the hell are you doing this crap anyways? What the hell happened to you?"

Castiel looked at Dean sadly. "Dean… please… it's all very complicated…"

"Well un-complicate it then. Start at the beginning. When did this virus start?"

Dean sat down on the floor near Castiel. The angel closed his eyes and sighed.

"Two years ago. That was when one of the Four Horsemen, Pestilence, appeared. He started the virus and it spread like wildfire through the land."

"No one could stop it?"

Castiel shook his head. "No. The humans didn't understand what it was. Those infected killed many of those that weren't. Some were immune, like you and I. Those who live here are those who are immune to the virus. Our numbers are few, though. We had managed to gather over one hundred people when we first arrived here and set up our base. Now we have maybe thirty left. Most have perished trying to fight the infected while trying to gather supplies."

Dean frowned. "So that's why this town is destroyed?"

Castiel nodded. "There was chaos when the virus hit. Across the world there were massive riots and looting. The infected have taken over most of this town."

"And what town is this?"

"Laramie, Wyoming. We were trying to make for the mountains. We thought it would be safer for us there. But we lost our means of travel. There was a great solar flare that wiped out all electrical appliances, including vehicles. We haven't been able to figure out a safe way to travel and so we've had to remain here."

Dean ran his hand wearily over his face. "Damn, Cas, this story just keeps getting better and better."

Castiel dropped his gaze and Dean saw the pain in his face. He really didn't want to talk about it, but he knew it was going to come up eventually.

"So… then do you mind explaining… well… us?"

Castiel looked back up at him sadly. "Why?"

Dean sighed. "Because it involves me and I'd kind of like to know!"

Castiel fidgeted nervously for a minute before reluctantly sighing.

"It… it started after you brought me to that… place… with all those women… the place where I upset one of the girls? When you told me how much fun you had with me that day and how happy you were something… happened. I realized that I was also happy when I was with you. That I _wanted_ to be with you whenever it was possible… I didn't tell you for a long time… I didn't fully understand it myself… we traveled together and you did your best to help me with my search… but… then the virus came… and then I… I fell apart…"

Castiel swallowed hard and wiped his eyes before continuing.

"I had lost all hope… I lost all of my powers because I had been separated from Heaven for so long… I didn't know what to do… I wanted to give up… to end it… but you… you wouldn't let me…" Castiel smiled weakly as he remembered. "You told me that you needed me… that even though the world was crashing down around us… at least we still had each other… and that you loved me…"

His voice faded and he dropped his gaze. Dean felt his stomach clench has he slowly realized what Castiel's words meant.

_Holy shit. So… Cas has feelings for me __**now**__!? Back in my time!? _

Dean was beginning to feel slightly overwhelmed with all this information. He was beginning to think maybe he would need to borrow some of Castiel's alcohol.

"OK…" Dean finally said quietly. "So then what happened to me? I mean, I know you're upset because I went missing or something."

He felt even guiltier as soon as he asked. Castiel clenched his fist and the tears he had been fighting finally escaped down his cheeks.

"We went out in search of an artifact," Castiel said hoarsely. "It was you, me, Jack, and Jean. We were trying to get to one of the buildings where you believed it was in. But we soon were attacked by the infected and overwhelmed… we were retreating back to here when you… you fell… you broke your ankle…"

Castiel struggled to continue. "I tried to convince you to let me help you back… but it was too far… you made me leave you behind…"

Castiel buried his face into his hands, too upset to say anything else. Dean sat silently as he absorbed the news.

"So… I'm dead?" Dean asked dully.

Castiel quickly stood up, clearly not wanting to discuss this anymore.

"We need to talk to Jack and Jean," he said briskly, trying to compose himself. "We have to decide what we're going to do now."

Dean stood up after him. As much as he wanted to ask more questions, he knew he would have to wait.

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OK, Folks! That's it for tonight! I'm tired and have a busy day tomorrow, but I promise to not leave you hanging too long! : )


	5. Chapter 5

Chapter 5

Jack and Jean stared silently at Dean while Castiel quietly relayed Dean's story. They had gone into one of the offset rooms in the building that Castiel had explained they regularly used for planning and would give them more privacy. It was a good thing because it didn't take a genius to see that the couple was not happy about the news.

"So," Jack said softly after Castiel finished. "You're not our Dean Winchester."

Dean shook his head. "No. I'm your Dean Winchester from five years ago."

The older man stared at the floor and ran his hand through his graying hair. Jean sat silently in her chair, one hand covering her mouth as she tried to fight back tears.

"Son of a bitch," Jack muttered as he stood up and began pacing around the small room. "Shit, this isn't good guys. This isn't good at all!"

"Jack… please…" Jean whispered softly.

"Jean, our people are losing faith left and right as it is! We're barely surviving already! How many suicides did we have just last week!? The only thing keeping this group from coming apart at the seams is our leader and now we find out that our leader is dead and replaced with a 2009 version of himself!"

"We don't know he's dead," Castiel said quietly. Dean could tell that he was trying to sound confident, but he could hear the strain in his voice.

Jack shook his head. "Cas, look. I don't like it anymore than you do. I know how you feel, but there is no way he could have survived out there on his own! Not with the infected already gunning for him like they have been! He's dead, Castiel. And like it or not, we have to accept that!"

Dean scowled at the man.

"Dude! I am sitting right here you know! And you are talking about my future self! I think maybe you should give me a little more credit. You have no proof that I'm dead out there!"

Jack turned and looked at him, smiling bitterly.

"Are you serious? Dean, you saw yourself how many infected are out there! And those were just the ones who chose to come after you! There are way more than that that are hiding and waiting for an opportunity to kill! You were injured. You couldn't run. There was no way you could make it out of there alive!"

Dean rose to his feet and looked defiantly at Jack.

"I have had to survive way worse things than this on my own and have had worse odds!"

Jack snorted. "You've faced worse than the fucking Apocalypse?"

Dean smirked. "Dude, I've been to Hell and back. I've hunted and fought every kind of monster out there! And let me tell you something; if I have a reason to survive, something to come back to, you damn well better believe I'm gonna do everything I can to make it back in one piece!"

With this statement he looked over at Castiel. The angel was sitting silently, his eyes closed and his face obviously distressed. Dean understood where this Jack was coming from. He even knew that the man was probably right. But it broke Dean's heart to see Castiel have to suffer from the man's words and if it meant giving the angel some hope, even if it was false hope, Dean was determined to give it to him.

Jack shook his head in amazement and smirked. "You know, Dean, I can see even before all this went down you were still something else. You cocky son of a bitch."

Dean shrugged casually. "Yes. Yes, I am."

Jean reached over and touched Jack's arm lightly.

"Please. Both of you, just stop. This isn't helping," she pleaded. "We still have to figure out what we're going to tell the others."

Jack and Dean watched each other carefully for a moment before Jack finally looked away and nodded.

"OK. Fine. This is what we're gonna do." He pointed at Dean. "You are now our Dean Winchester. The story is that you managed to escape the infected, but you suffered a concussion along the way that makes you forget things. That should work until we get everything sorted out."

Jack then turned and looked at Castiel.

"We're all gonna act like nothing out of the ordinary. Cas, you are gonna have to treat him just like our Dean while you can be seen by the others, alright? And it'll be your job to fill him in on everything that's happened so he can at least act the part."

Dean saw Castiel bite his lower lip and nod slowly. Dean knew it was going to torture Castiel to have to pretend everything was fine when it obviously wasn't, but he knew that the angel would certainly try his very best.

"Great," Dean said with a sigh. "So, speaking of getting filled in on all the details, why don't you start by telling me where some people are?"

Castiel looked at him hesitantly. "What do you mean?"

"Well, where's Bobby for one? I know he'd be one that'd be front and center for this showdown."

He saw a look of sadness cross Castiel's already distraught face and he felt his stomach tighten.

"Wait… he's not…"

"He became infected," Castiel said quietly. "We tried to reach him in time, but it was too late. We had to kill him."

Dean bit his lower lip, trying to fight down the wave of grief he felt wash over him. "What about any of the other hunters? Ellen? Jo? Rufus?"

"Infected or killed by the infected," Castiel replied. "There are hardly any hunters left. The virus killed many of them."

Dean ran his hand over his face. There was still one person he needed to know about. The only other person left that really mattered to him.

"What about Sam?" Dean asked darkly. "Why isn't he here? And I know he didn't get infected. I know he's immune to it! So where the hell is he?"

The room became dead silent. Castiel quickly dropped his gaze, refusing to look at Dean. When Dean turned he saw that both Jack and Jean also wouldn't meet his gaze. He turned back to Castiel and began slowly walking towards him.

"Cas?" Dean said warningly. "Where hell is my brother?"

Castiel swallowed hard and Dean could see the struggle on his pale face.

"He's not here, Dean," he said quietly.

"I know he's not here! Where is he? Tell me!"

Jack cleared his throat. "Dean… I'm sorry…"

Dean spun around and looked at Jack furiously. "Sorry? What do you mean you're sorry?"

"Jack, it would be better if he learns the truth from me," Castiel said hoarsely.

Dean turned back around to face Castiel and folded his arms across his chest.

"Fine. So what's the truth then?"

Castiel took a deep breath before uttering one word.

"Lucifer."

The knot in Dean's stomach tightened. He swallowed hard.

"What do you mean Lucifer?"

"Lucifer reached your brother before we could. Your brother… he, like you, was destined to be a vessel… _Lucifer's vessel_."

The cold realization began to hit Dean and he shook his head slowly.

"Wait… no…"

"Lucifer took Sam as his vessel. It was when this happened that Pestilence appeared and the Croatoan virus began."

Dean's heart sank. This couldn't be real. This couldn't really be happening. He shook his head in disbelief.

"No… no way… I mean… Lucifer was… is an angel, right? He would have had to get Sam's permission… Sam would never have said yes!"

"He did say yes, Dean. We still aren't sure why, but we know he did. And we know he intends to kill you once he finds you. That is what we have been trying to do these last two years. We have been trying to find a way to kill Lucifer."

Dean stared silently at Castiel who looked sadly back him. Finally, Dean turned and walked to the door.

"I need some air," he said as he left.

* * *

Dean had wandered aimlessly around the building for almost an hour, trying to absorb what he had learned. It had torn him up inside to see how all the people in his life that he gave a damn about were now either dead, grieving, or now possessed by Satan himself. He didn't know what to think or what he was going to do.

His eyes finally began to droop and it occurred to him that he still hadn't gotten any sleep in what he could guess was a 24 hour time span. He realized that he wasn't any use to anyone like this so he made his way back to what he assumed was Castiel's room to see where he was supposed to sleep.

He found Castiel sitting on the worn bed in his room, nursing a new bottle of alcohol. He looked up when Dean entered.

"Hi," Castiel said quietly as he hesitantly set down the bottle.

"Hey," Dean said wearily. "I was just wondering where I'm supposed to sleep as your fearless leader."

He saw a blush creep up Castiel's cheeks.

"Actually we… we share a bed… but I can sleep elsewhere if you prefer…"

Dean held up a hand to stop Castiel and shook his head.

"Don't worry about it, Cas. It's fine. Right now I'm too damn tired to care anyways. Let's just get some sleep." He then looked at the bottle on the nightstand and reached out for it. "And if you want to keep that bottle you better share some of it."

Castiel passed it to him carefully and Dean took a swig. He let out a relieved sigh as he felt the burn of the alcohol slide down his throat.

"Damn," Dean chuckled as he looked at the bottle. "Strong stuff."

"You made it," Castiel said quietly. "You… you said you liked it strong."

Dean looked at Castiel. The angel sat nervously on the bed, obviously unsure of himself. Dean couldn't help but grin as it reminded him of how nervous Castiel had been when he had brought him to that whorehouse in Maine.

"Hey, relax, Cas," Dean said gently. "We're gonna get through this together, alright?"

Castiel looked at him hesitantly before nodding.

"I… I know… it's just… strange."

"Yeah, tell me about it," Dean said as he began to get undressed. He stripped down to his t-shirt and underwear before crawling into bed. He looked at Castiel who was still sitting nervously on the edge of the bed. "You coming to bed or are you just gonna watch me sleep?"

He saw a ghost of a smile touch Castiel's lips before the angel nodded. Dean watched him begin undressing, taking another swig from the bottle he still held. The alcohol was definitely potent stuff and Dean could already feel its effects working on his tired and hungry body.

He found he couldn't take his eyes off of Castiel. He had never seen the angel like this before and the hunter could now fully appreciate his long, lean form that had always been hidden under layers of clothing. Castiel was definitely good looking and Dean was beginning to understand the attraction the angel had on him.

Castiel took off his shirt and hung it over the back of a chair. When he turned Dean could see Castiel's back. His eyes widened when he saw two large, ugly scars, one on each shoulder blade. Dean bolted up in the bed and gasped.

"What the hell happened to you?" he demanded in horror.

Castiel spun around startled. "What-?"

Dean set the bottle on the stand next to him. He then reached over and pulled Castiel into the bed with him and spun him around so he could exam his back closer.

"_These_," Dean said as he trailed his fingers over the twisted pink scars. "What happened?"

He felt Castiel tense under his touch.

"Those were my wings," Castiel said quietly. "Raphael, the archangel, when he found me after what we had done to him he cut them off as punishment. He figured since he couldn't kill me that this punishment would have to suffice."

Dean turned Castiel around to face him and he saw the sadness in his face. Dean felt a stab of anguish go through him as he reached up and cupped Castiel's face with his hand. It broke his heart to see Castiel suffering so much, especially knowing it was because of him.

"Cas… I'm sorry…" Dean said quietly.

Castiel smiled weakly. "It's OK, Dean. That was several years ago. It doesn't even really hurt much anymore."

"No," Dean said firmly. "It's not OK. No one should ever hurt you. Not while I'm with you."

Castiel dropped his gaze nervously and he couldn't help but turn into Dean's touch.

"Dean…" Castiel said weakly. "What are you doing…?"

Dean leaned in closer, unable to help himself. "I… I don't know…"

Their lips brushed each other, lightly at first. Dean could feel Castiel's chapped lips under his own, could smell the alcohol on his breath. Something in Dean's brain was screaming at him that this was completely wrong and inappropriate and he needed to stop it now.

And then there was the part of him that suddenly realized just how much he desired the fallen angel.

He tangled his fingers into Castiel's tussled hair and crashed his mouth into his. Castiel let out a moan, only serving to fuel Dean's desire more. Dean slipped his tongue into Castiel's mouth, probing and tasting him. Castiel's hands traveled everywhere along Dean's body, pulling his t-shirt over his head and tossing it aside. The action caused them to separate long enough to look each other in the eyes, gasping for breath.

"Tell me what you want, Cas," Dean said, his voice low and husky.

"I… you… I want you…" Castiel whispered back.

Dean began nuzzling Castiel's neck and running his hand over the angel's cloth-covered erection. Castiel moaned and whimpered wantonly under Dean's touch.

"God, I want you," Dean murmured against Castiel's skin. "I can't believe I never realized it before…"

"You didn't know…" Castiel whispered back, his hand traveling beneath the fabric of Dean's underwear. He grasped Dean's growing erection and began stroking him firmly, causing Dean to cry out.

"Cas… oh my god…" Dean quickly slid his hand into Castiel's underwear and began mimicking the angel's actions.

Moans and gasps filled the room as the men thrust into each other's hands, their lips pressed together hungrily. It felt incredible, better than Dean could have ever dreamed. He didn't want it to end, but he could feel Castiel pulling him closer and closer to completion.

"Oh god… yes… harder… oh god… Cas… I'm gonna… _oh god_!"

Dean's release spilled over Castiel's hand and Dean became lost in the waves of pleasure that overtook him. He heard Castiel quickly cry out and felt the angel's release coat his own hand. They collapsed weakly together on the bed and it wasn't long before Dean passed out from exhaustion with Castiel curled up against his chest.

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There! Figured I'd give you guys one really long update versus two of them. And, yeah, couldn't help the smut. It just happened! *blush*


	6. Chapter 6

Chapter 6

Dean slowly opened his eyes and blinked a few times while the room slowly came into focus. It took him a minute to realize just where he was and when. He felt something warm and heavy lying on his chest and when he looked down he saw Castiel's dark, tussled head resting comfortably on top of him.

Dean's breath caught in his throat as he stared at the sleeping angel. He couldn't help feel a stab of guilt as he knew that what they had done last night probably hadn't been the greatest idea. He didn't actually know why he had done it. Well, that wasn't completely true. Dean had to admit to himself that he had always had an underlying attraction to the angel that had begun at some point over the last year. He had just always pushed it aside and ignored it. But now, confronted with the truth that he could no longer deny, Dean had found himself throwing caution to the wind and taking what he had always secretly wanted.

He gently ran his fingers through the sleeping angel's feathery soft hair and he felt his heart ache. The truth of the matter was that while he knew this was Castiel, it wasn't _his_ Castiel. It wasn't his angel with his wide, innocent eyes that would look at him confused any time he tried to make a joke. His angel who looked like he was going to have a heart attack in the whorehouse in Maine.

His angel who still had hope.

Dean decided at that moment that when he did finally make it back to his own time he would do everything in his power to make sure Castiel remained the angel he had grown to love. And he would do everything he could to keep him safe.

Castiel suddenly begin to stir and slowly turned his head and looked up at Dean. Dean couldn't help but smile at Castiel's sleepy face and he chuckled.

"Morning, Sunshine," Dean said grinning.

He could see on Castiel's face the slow realization of what had happened last night and he saw a deep blush color Castiel's cheeks. Dean hugged him gently.

"Hey, it's OK, Cas. We both needed it. It's not a big deal," Dean said calmly.

Castiel nodded and he carefully sat up.

"I know… it's just… strange… I mean… last night was wonderful… but… you're not…"

"Your Dean," Dean finished for him. "I know. You're not my Cas either."

Dean allowed himself to put his hand over Castiel's.

"We're both in a really fucked up situation right now. And what I think we need to do now is figure out how to get us back to ones we belong with."

Dean's words brought obvious comfort to the angel. Castiel smiled the first real smile Dean had seen since he had arrived, and nodded.

"You're right, Dean."

"Yeah, I know!" Dean replied with a smirk. Castiel chuckled and swatted Dean with one of the pillows and together they got up and ready for the day.

* * *

Dean was more than accustomed to jumping into random roles whenever a situation called for it. He knew how to have a conversation about topics he had no clue about, but make it sound like he did. He knew how to act, knew how to not let any weakness show that would give him away.

He decided of all the roles he had to play, he liked being Dean Winchester of 2014 the best. It was by far the easiest he had ever taken on.

Castiel had pointed out who was who and Dean quickly learned names. The angel had also explained how Dean acted now, which was a lot quieter and a lot more serious. Again, pretty darn easy.

Even Jack and Jean were pleased with him when they met in the planning room later to talk.

"Not bad, Winchester," Jack said, the hint of approval in his voice apparent. "I gotta admit, I didn't know if you could pull it off."

"I've had to do worse," Dean said casually with a shrug. "So how about you fill me in on what your plans are?"

Jean pulled out a large map and unrolled it onto the table in front of them. After weighting down the edges so it wouldn't roll back up she pointed to a circled building in the middle of the map.

"This is the town we're in," she explained. "This is our building. The day you went missing we were on a recon mission trying to reach this building."

She pointed to another building that was about a block away.

"So what's in there that we need?" Dean asked.

Castiel smiled weakly. "The Colt."

Dean looked at him in shock. "What?!"

Castiel nodded. "The Colt. That was the reason we came here in the first place. We had been trying to track it down, but the virus outbreak made us lose track of it. Then two years ago we heard that it was somewhere here in this town. Of course, we got trapped here before we could really search the town for it and we've lost many fighters in the search for it. But we've managed to narrow down the possibilities and we believe this is the building."

"And you think that we can end all this with the Colt?" Dean asked in amazement.

Castiel reached into his pocket and pulled out and small handful of silver bullets. As he set each one on the table Dean could that the bullets were made of silver and had symbols inscribed on them.

"These are for the Colt?" Dean asked quietly.

Castiel nodded solemnly. "I made them each myself. Each one is made of pure silver and my own blood. I also inscribed each one with Enochian symbols. Once we have the Colt we'll be able to use these to kill Lucifer."

Dean picked up one of the bullets and studied it carefully.

"So… we just need the Colt then."

Castiel nodded. "Yes."

Dean counted the bullets on the table and frowned.

"Why are there only six bullets?"

Castiel sighed and dropped his gaze.

"Because of how these bullets were created only you and I are able to use the Colt with these bullets. We made thirteen total. You had seven, I had these six. In case something was to happen to one of us we would still have enough bullets to kill Lucifer."

Dean swallowed hard as the slow realization of what Castiel's words meant sunk in.

"And that's why I made you leave me behind. And that's why you left. You had to."

Castiel stared down at one of the bullets in front of him and Dean could see a tear trickle down his cheek. Jean quickly moved to Castiel's side and put her arm around him.

"He did what he had to," Jean said firmly while rubbing Castiel's arm gently. "Dean knew the risks and knew the costs. Castiel knew what he had to do to save the rest of us."

Dean nodded slowly.

"Alright," he finally managed to say gruffly. "So then how do we get to this gun?"

Jack let out a bitter laugh.

"That's the million dollar question, Winchester. We've spent the last six months trying to get to that damn building and nothing. So if you happen to have any bright ideas, now would be the time to share them!"

Dean swallowed hard as he looked at the silver bullets on the table and then at Castiel. He ran his hands through his hair before he finally shook his head.

"I dunno… look, I think I need to take a minute."

He got up and quickly left the room before his face could betray his emotions. It was all becoming too much, especially knowing now the real reason Castiel had left him. Dean knew Castiel well enough, even this future one, to know that it had to destroy him inside to have to leave him behind. Castiel had always done everything in his power to keep Dean safe, even when it cost him everything. And now Dean had no way to make it up to him.

Dean wound his way through the darkened hallways, carrying a small lantern. He didn't know where he was going; just that he needed to keep moving so he could think. So he could try to figure out how to fix all this. He went down several stairways until he found himself in the building's basement. It was filled with broken and dusty furniture that had long been forgotten about. Dean slowly made his way around the furniture before finally stopping and leaning up against one of the support posts.

"Son of a bitch, what the hell am I going to do?" Dean muttered miserably to himself.

He set down the lantern and began pacing back and forth while he desperately tried to think of a solution. Everyone he came up with, however, only ended in deaths, a lot of deaths. And none of them were a guarantee.

"Dammit!" Dean yelled furiously. He grabbed a small broken chunk of concrete from the floor and hurled it at the nearby wall.

Then something happened that Dean didn't expect.

The concrete struck the wall and Dean could see in the faint light a part of the wall move ever so slightly and dust fall through the air. He grabbed his lantern and moved closer. Upon closer inspection he found a small crack that was in a shape of a door. Dean began shoving the broken furniture out of the way and indeed revealed a small door, complete with a half broken door knob.

Taking a deep breath, Dean grabbed the door knob and after a minute of pulling the door popped open. Behind it was a long dark tunnel.

Dean smiled.

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Yeah, I'm a slacker. I meant to get this done before the episode aired, but oh well. I'm off tonight so my goal is to get this either done or as close to done as possible! : )


	7. Chapter 7

Chapter 7

The underground tunnels were dark and filled with the smell of mildew and decay. It was quite obvious that they had been abandoned for decades as some parts had caved in and required the travelers to have to dig their way through. It was slow going and there were times when the tunnel would split off and then one would lead to a dead end, forcing them to turn around.

But they were going forward and in the direction of the building they wanted.

Dean was leading the group, followed by Castiel and then Jack and Jean. They each carried a lantern and were armed with every possible weapon they could carry as well as a bag containing basic survival items. Fortunately, it appeared that the infected had not found these tunnels yet. They were equipped to be able to handle any infected encounters, but fortunately it never came to that.

Some of the side tunnels that were followed lead to various buildings. Castiel, Jack, and Jean had explored enough of the surrounding buildings to know which ones they had entered. They also knew that they were getting that much closer to their goal.

Finally, after four long hours of searching, they came across another door. After getting it open they found themselves in another basement. They slowly made their way to the stairs that led them up to the main floor. When they opened that door Jean let out a small gasp.

"Oh my God," She whispered. "I think… I think this is it!"

Dean felt Castiel tense next to him and he looked around carefully. It appeared the building had been a library before the virus had hit. There were rows of bookshelves, several knocked over onto the floor. The books were covered with an inch of dust as were the computers scattered around. As they walked through the building it appeared that it had been undisturbed for some time. There were no sign of the infected anywhere.

"Where do you think it is then?" Dean asked quietly, still keeping an eye out for anything that could jump out at them.

Castiel looked around, his brow furrowed with obvious concentration.

"I'm not sure… but it has to be here somewhere…"

They continued moving slowly when suddenly Castiel let out a small gasp. He pointed over to a section of the library.

"There! I think it has to be there!"

Castiel quickly began moving to where he had pointed and Dean and the other two hurried to keep up with him. They soon saw what he was referring to. In the center of the section sat a large old book. When Castiel reached it he reverently ran his fingers over the leather binding.

"The Bible," he whispered quietly. Taking a deep breath he flung open the book…

They saw someone had hollowed out the inside of the book where something could be hidden inside of it. It was certainly large enough to hold the Colt.

But instead it was empty.

Castiel's face fell and he shook his head slowly.

"No…" he whispered in horror as he touched the book. "No… it's supposed to be here! This was where they hid it!"

Jean gently placed her hand on Castiel's shoulder.

"Cas… they must have moved it. They must have known we were coming."

Castiel closed his eyes and dropped his head.

"He died… we lost him all for nothing!"

Jean pulled Castiel into her arms while he slumped over in defeat. Jack stood nearby, his hand over his eyes and looking crushed. Dean forced himself to look away, not being able to bear seeing Castiel so upset.

And that was when he noticed something.

He could see an old exit sign hanging from the wall and the door leading out beneath it. And the door was completely blocked. From the inside.

Dean's grip on his weapon tightened and he began looking at his surroundings more closely. He then noticed foot prints in the dust on the floor. Specifically a set that led away from where they were standing.

"Guys," Dean said as he moved closer to the others. "I think someone else is in here!"

The others looked up at him in surprise. That was when they heard the click of a gun being cocked.

"Good assumption. Now you wanna tell me who the fuck you are and why the hell you're with my friends?"

All four of them spun around at the sound of the voice and their jaws dropped in shock.

There stood Dean Winchester. And he had the Colt aimed right at them.

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Yeah, I know it's short! But you know I had to leave you with a good cliffy somewhere! ; )


	8. Chapter 8

Hey, guys. Sorry about the delay with the update. Sunday night I was in the ER because I ended up having a miscarriage. I'm doing OK, but it's been rough the last couple days. Fortunately, I am blessed with the most amazing and loving husband ever and he's helping me get through this. I also have wonderful friends who are there for me. I also have the support of all my online friends who are absolutely incredible. People I've only ever met on here and talked to through my Twitter account, but have given me encouraging words and support.

I also have to thank all you readers out there. The doctor gave me two weeks off from work on the condition I keep myself busy and work on getting myself recovered. Writing will definitely be something I do to get myself there and knowing I have readers waiting for my updates is definitely uplifting.

So thank you, all of you. And I will do my best to keep writing for you! : )

Chapter 8

The room was dead silent as the four travelers stared in shock at the man standing there. Future Dean stood there calmly, keeping the Colt aimed straight at Dean's chest.

"You gonna answer me?" Future Dean demanded.

Castiel finally stepped forward, his eyes wide and filled with tears.

"Dean?" He whispered hoarsely. "Is… is that really you?"

"Of course it's me," Future Dean answered tersely. "Who the hell else would it be?"

"But… but I saw you… all those infected…"

"Fell down a drain hole. Managed to get it blocked off before they could come in after me. Then I found the tunnels and made it here." He glared at Past Dean menacingly. "Now are you gonna explain who the hell this guy is or do I need to just shoot him now?"

"Whoa whoa!" Dean said, throwing his hands up defensively.

"No! Wait!" Castiel quickly moved in between them. "It's you! Well, the past version of you! From 2009!"

Future Dean arched an eyebrow at Castiel and smirked. "Oh really?"

"Yes!"

"This is supposed to be me?"

"Yes!"

"From the past?"

"Yes! Zachariah sent him!"

Future Dean's eyes narrowed. "Where is he?"

"I don't know!" Dean said still not taking his eyes off the Colt. "I haven't seen him since he dumped me here."

"Well, isn't that convenient?"

"Not really. I just want to get back to my own time. I only came along because they needed my help."

"Oh yeah?"

"Yeah!"

"OK," Future Dean lowered the Colt slightly. "Prove it."

Dean frowned. "Prove it? How?"

Future Dean's eyes flickered towards Castiel and then Jack and Jean.

"You guys go check out the main office and make sure the door is still blocked off good. I-… _we_ will be in after a little while."

Castiel looked anxiously at both Deans as he slowly walked over to Future Dean.

"Dean… please… don't hurt him," he said quietly. "He really is you. I know…"

Future Dean looked at Castiel and then slowly a knowing look came over his face. He moistened his lips before nodding slowly.

"Don't worry, Cas," he said quietly. "It'll be fine."

Castiel hesitantly reached out his hand before catching himself and slowly drawing it back. He nodded slowly before turning and heading towards the office with Jack and Jean following. After they left Future Dean fixed his gaze firmly on his former self.

"Alright, now that they're gone, tell me why the hell I shouldn't just kill you now?"

"Uh… because you don't want to hurt yourself?" Dean attempted lamely.

"Oh yeah? My past self, huh? So tell me, _Dean_, tell me something about myself no one else would know. Not even Castiel, who, by the way, I know you're fucking."

Dean's eyes widened in shock. "Whoa! What!? We… it… it was just one time… besides, I didn't even know I- we started having sex with him! It just kind of happened! And he thought you were dead!"

Future Dean's eyes narrowed further and leveled the Colt straight at Dean's chest.

"You better start saying something to cover your ass because I am this close to blowing you away, you piece of shit!"

Dean began wracking through his brain trying to come up with something. Then he smiled.

"Rhonda Hurley."

Future Dean cocked his head, obviously interested.

"We were, uh... 19. She made us try on her panties. They were pink. And satiny," Dean smirked at the memory. "And you know what? We kind of liked it."

Future Dean thought for a moment before slowly lowering the gun and nodding.

"Touché."

Dean let out a relieved sigh as Future Dean began limping towards him. He could now see his future self was obviously injured. His right leg was encased in a crude makeshift splint that supported his foot. His future self looked thinner and more worn than himself.

"So why did Zach drop you off here?" Future Dean asked calmly as he settled himself in one of the nearby chairs.

Dean shrugged. "No clue. Other than he thinks this will make me agree to be Michael's vessel," he said as he sat down in another chair close by.

Future Dean sighed and looked down at the Colt sitting on the table in front of him. "So you don't want to be his vessel?"

Dean stared at him surprised. "No! You of all people should know that!"

Future Dean smiled bitterly. "Yeah, and that was what I thought. Thought I could save the world on my own. And look at where it got me."

"I can change things, though! Now that I know-"

"Yeah, you can change things! You don't have to deal with all the crap I've seen! You can actually do the right thing and let Michael take you as his vessel like he's supposed to!"

Future Dean's words took Dean completely off guard.

"Wait a minute… what!? You're saying I should let myself become Michael's meatsuit?"

"That's exactly what I'm saying. This," he gestured around himself. "All this, won't happen! All those people won't die. Shit, you can save Cas even!"

"Cas wouldn't want me to do that!" Dean argued.

Future Dean leaned forward and looked at Dean intently.

"Honestly, I don't give a shit what Cas would want. You have no idea what it was like to have to watch what they did to him." He nodded at Dean's startled look. "Oh yeah, I bet he didn't tell you all the gory details. Probably just mentioned they cut of his wings and left it at that. He doesn't like to talk about it."

Future Dean ran his hand over his face and swallowed hard.

"They caught us in Houston. They tied me up and made me watch. Made watch as they tied him down and then saw off his wings. I had to watch as he screamed and begged for them to stop. I had to sit there, not able to do a damn thing while he cried and pleaded for _God_ to save him. Begged for His mercy." Future Dean slowly shook his head, his eyes filling with tears. "But God never showed up. And they just left him there, bleeding almost to death. Took me an hour to finally work loose and get him help."

Dean dropped his gaze, feeling his heart break inside. He couldn't believe that the angels would be so cruel to one of their own.

"Never was the same after that," Future Dean continued softly. "All the hope he once had just vanished. Found him trying to kill himself four times since then. He'd use anything from a gun to a rope to slitting his wrists. I was scared to death that he'd try it this last time while I was gone, but figured he would at least try to hold on until the Colt was found."

He paused and looked over towards the direction of the office before looking back at Dean.

"Don't think about yourself, Dean," Future Dean said quietly. "If anything, think about Castiel. Don't let him turn into this."

He stood up and began limping back to the office, leaving Dean to think about his words.


	9. Chapter 9

Chapter 9

"Lucifer is here," Future Dean said calmly, pointing to a building on the map laid out in front of him. "We can cross through the back of this building we're in here and then cut across to the front of the old sanitarium."

"And how do you know he's there?" Dean asked hesitantly.

They had gathered in the office where Future Dean had set up camp. Castiel was sitting to his right and Jack and Jean had gathered on the left side of the table. Dean sat in the back of the office, observing.

Future Dean smirked. "Found a demon and got him to talk."

"And you believed him?" Dean asked incredulously.

"He- _you_ have methods," Castiel said quietly.

Dean stared at his future self in disbelief. "So we're torturing again?"

Future Dean looked at him sternly. "We do what's necessary to survive."

Dean only half-listened to the rest of the discussion. He couldn't believe what he had turned into in the five years that had past. There was no compassion left in him. And no hope other than that which was in the Colt and defeating Lucifer. And even though he knew he and Castiel were lovers, there had been no indication of any of that since his return. In fact, Future Dean had barely acknowledged Castiel the whole time other than to relate his plans.

"Alright," Future Dean said finally. "Let's get everything together and we'll head out."

Jack and Jean nodded and quickly left to prepare. Dean stood up and walked out of the office when he heard Future Dean say something.

"Hey, Cas. Come here for a second."

Dean stopped and allowed himself to peak around the corner. To his surprise he saw his future self wrap his arms around Castiel gently and hug him tightly.

"I missed you, baby," Future Dean said quietly in Castiel's ear.

Castiel buried his face in the crook of Future Dean's neck. "I missed you too," he whispered back as he hugged Future Dean tightly.

"Told ya I'd be fine," Future Dean said lightly. He ran his fingers through Castiel's hair. "I'll always fight for you, baby. I'll always fight to come back to you. I love you."

Castiel allowed himself to look up and Future Dean smiled tenderly at him and gently stroked his cheek before leaning in and kissing him. Castiel's eyes fluttered closed as he kissed his lover back, obviously happy to be there.

Dean turned and walked away, feeling like a voyeur, even though technically he was just watching himself. It killed him inside to see his angel in such pain and he knew that even though Castiel was happy now, it wasn't going to last. Deep down he knew that this adventure wasn't going to end well.

* * *

"This is a suicide mission!" Dean gasped in horror. "You're sending them to _die_! You're sending _Castiel_ in there to die!"

Dean's unease had grown as they had traveled to Lucifer's supposed lair. For one, it had been way too easy. The street had been deserted and remained so the entire trip there. Dean knew that Lucifer would never let himself be snuck up upon like that.

And then there was the way Future Dean was acting. Dean knew himself well enough to know how he acted when he was holding back or lying. And this guy was _definitely_ holding back. He could see it in his face. So Dean confronted him, away from the others, and demanded to know the truth.

"Sacrifices have to be made, Dean," Future Dean said curtly. "They all knew the dangers as soon as they signed up for this."

"You're sending them in to be your distraction and you're not even telling them!"

"They know what they need to know!"

Dean shook his head in amazement. "And you told Cas you'd always fight for him! That you _love_ him! And you're just going to sacrifice him like he's nothing?"

Future Dean stepped in closer and narrowed his eyes menacingly. "Castiel is not nothing to me! But you've seen what's happened to him, what he's become! He is miserable here! He hates this life! He was never meant to be human! He was never meant to stay with me like this! He's dying for a greater purpose. He can die knowing he was fighting for the greater good! His sacrifices can finally mean something! I'll be able to kill Lucifer because of what he does!"

Dean stepped back, shaking his head while tears filled his eyes.

"I don't know who the hell you are," Dean whispered. "I would never do that to him! Or to Jack and Jean! They're human beings! And I love Cas too much to let him be your sacrificial lamb! I won't let you do this!"

He turned to go back to the others. He didn't see the butt of Future Dean's rifle come at him and hit him in the back of the head, knocking him out cold.

* * *

Dean came to and blinked several times. Suddenly he heard the echoes of gunfire and then a scream of agony cut through the air. His stomach lurched as he staggered to his feet and began running in the direction of the screams.

He rounded the building and soon found himself in an overgrown courtyard. Thunder rumbled through the air as he got closer and lightening flashed in the sky. He ran up the stone path and into a small garden area. And then the screams abruptly stopped.

What he saw filled him with horror that he hadn't felt since Hell.

He first saw Castiel's lifeless body laying several feet away. Dean could tell he had been brutally attacked by the infected, but had still kept fighting to be by Dean's side. Blood seeped from a large gash across his chest and pooled in the grass beneath him.

Dean then saw his future self lying disabled on the ground. The Colt lay a dozen feet away, completely useless. Standing over him was a tall man dressed in a crisp white suit. The man's foot was pressed against Future Dean's neck. Dean saw Future Dean's eyes flick up towards him for a moment. And then came the sickening sound of his neck being snapped under the man's foot. Dean watched himself die.

He stood there helplessly, too horrified to know what to do.

And then the man turned.

Dean saw his brother, Sam, standing there. But it only took one look into the man's eyes to know without a doubt that it wasn't Sam in there. It was Lucifer.

"Oh, hello, Dean," Lucifer said with mild surprise. He smiled eerily. "I was wondering when you were finally going to get here."

Dean swallowed hard as his eyes darted from his dead future self, to Castiel, and then back to Lucifer.

"Well, go ahead. Kill me."

Lucifer cocked his head in confusion. "Kill you?" He glanced back at the dead body behind him. "Don't you think that would be a little...redundant?"

Dean felt himself trembling like a leaf and on the verge of collapsing. This was a nightmare. A sick, twisted nightmare that all he wanted to do was wake up from. But he wasn't waking up and he could see himself dead on the ground and his angel dead on the other side of the courtyard.

And his brother was Lucifer.

Lucifer sighed and a look of sadness crossed his face.

"I'm sorry. It must be painful… speaking to me in this shape," he gestured to himself. "And then to see Castiel… to see what happened to him. I am very sorry for it. I did not want him to suffer the way he did. And your brother… well, it had to be your brother. It had to be."

Lucifer reached out to place a comforting hand on Dean's shoulder. Dean recoiled, a look of horror mixed with disgust on his face. Lucifer frowned.

"You don't have to be afraid of me, Dean. After all, you're here because I needed to talk to you. To explain to you the way things will be."

Dean tried to swallow, but his mouth was devoid of any moisture.

"What are you talking about?" Dean managed to get out. "You're not the one who brought me here. Zachariah was!"

Lucifer smiled as if Dean's response amused him.

"Yes, it was Zachariah who brought you here. And I did thank him for that. I sent him on his way, though. He can be a bit… dramatic about things. I didn't want him to interrupt us."

It was now taking every ounce of Dean's strength to stay standing. He didn't know how he was going to get back to his own time. He didn't know if it was even possible. He couldn't tear his eyes off of Castiel's mutilated body, his blue eyes staring blankly at nothing, his face twisted with pain and fear. Dean could hear Lucifer talking. Talking about why he really fell and the injustice of it all. Talking about how God betrayed him by loving the humans more.

He didn't care. It didn't matter. He needed to get home. He needed to call Sam. He needed to at least try to save him, to keep him from being Lucifer's vessel.

And he needed to see Castiel. He needed his angel.

"I don't care," Dean whispered hoarsely, looking Lucifer in the eye. "You're not fooling me. You know that? With this sympathy-for-the-devil crap. I know what you are!"

Lucifer looked at him with interest. "What am I?"

"You're the same thing, only bigger. The same brand of cockroach I've been squashing my whole life… an ugly, evil, belly-to-the-ground, supernatural piece of crap. The only difference between them and you is the size of your ego."

Dean clenched his fists at his sides as the tears escaped down his cheeks.

"And you murdered Castiel. You let him suffer just like the rest of those prick angels did! You're all monsters, every one of you! And I'm gonna make sure it won't happen to him! Not again! I won't stop until the angels pay for what they did to him and until you're dead for what you've done to my brother! I swear I won't stop!"

Lucifer took a step closer to him with a look of earnest.

"I know you won't. I know you won't say "yes" to Michael, either. And I know you won't kill Sam. And I know you'll make whatever sacrifices you have to in order to save Castiel. Because you love him too much. You love them both too much." Lucifer gave Dean a bittersweet smile. "Whatever you do... you will always end up here. Whatever choices you make, whatever details you alter, we will always end up ... here… I win… So… I win."

The tears rolled down Dean's face. This was too much… it was all too much…

Suddenly, the world began spinning violently. Lucifer began to swirl and then fade away as did the courtyard. Dean felt like he was falling through the air, unable to grab onto anything to stop himself…

"_DEAN!!!"_

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One more chapter to go, folks! Finally going to wrap this up! : )

And thank you all for your kind words and support. I've said it before, but I am truly blessed to have such wonderful people who are my loyal readers. You've all made me feel a little bit better about the situation I'm dealing with, so thank you!


	10. Chapter 10

Chapter 10

Dean's eyes flew open with a loud gasp. The dingy hotel room slowly came into focus as did Castiel's concerned face leaning over him. Dean quickly sat up and Castiel moved out of the way to let him.

"I'm back," Dean said with relief.

Castiel frowned. "You were dreaming. It was a rather intense dream, however. I had a great deal of difficulty freeing you from it."

"It was Zach," Dean explained. "He sent me into the future five years."

He quickly reached over and grabbed his cell phone before Castiel had the chance to respond. Flipping it open he scrolled through the phone numbers. Castiel watched him with interest.

"What are you doing?"

"Calling Sam."

Dean listened to the phone ring on the other end, his heart in his throat. God, what if he didn't answer…

"Hello?" Sam half-asleep voice answered after the third ring.

A wave of relief coursed over him. "Sam. It's Dean."

"Dean? It's… it's four in the morning. Are you OK?"

"Yeah… yeah, I'm fine. Look, where are you right now?"

"I'm about an hour north of Lincoln, Nebraska. Why? What's going on?"

"Nothing, I just… I just think maybe we need to talk. You know, face-to-face. Maybe we could meet up somewhere. How about Topeka? I have a few things I need to take care here and then I can head out. Is that OK?"

"Yeah. Yeah, Topeka is fine. Let me just my stuff together and I can head out."

"Good. That's… that's good, Sam. I'll see ya soon, alright?"

"Alright. See you soon."

It didn't take a genius to notice the hopeful tone in Sam's voice. Dean wanted to kick himself for being so blinded by his own anger to not realize just how much he had been hurting Sam by keeping him away. At least now maybe he'd have a chance to fix things.

Dean flipped the phone closed and dropped it to his side. Letting out a long sigh he ran his hand over his face wearily. When he looked back up he saw Castiel still sitting on the edge of the bed watching him with a concerned look.

"Are you alright, Dean?"

Dean couldn't help but smile at Castiel. He nodded slowly.

"Yeah. Yeah, I'm OK, Cas. Just really glad to be back in my own time and to have you back to being… well, _you_."

Castiel cocked his head curiously. "I was in this future you saw."

Dean nodded. "Yeah. But… you had changed… a lot… hell, I had changed. I didn't even recognize what I had turned into. And what I had let you become…"

His voice trailed off. He shuddered at the memory of Castiel's lifeless body lying in the courtyard. He shook his head finally as if to clear the memory. Suddenly he felt Castiel gently place his hand on his shoulder.

"If this was Zachariah's doing then he could have manipulated the future you saw. The past cannot be changed, no matter what you try. But the future is more malleable. There are many different possible outcomes depending on choices that are made. Zachariah probably showed you one that he believed would most likely get you to agree to being Michael's vessel."

Dean took a deep breath and nodded slowly at Castiel's words.

"Yeah, you're probably right. And he sure did pick a fucked up world to show me. But I can tell you one thing; the last thing I plan on doing is letting that archangel make me his meatsuit because of it. I know I can change things, do it the right way. I will make things right again."

Castiel studied Dean carefully. "Which was why you called Sam."

Dean nodded. "He's supposed to become Lucifer's vessel. I'm gonna make sure that doesn't happen. I don't care what it takes."

Castiel nodded and averted his gaze.

"So then our travels together have come to an end then."

Dean looked up sharply at Castiel. The angel wasn't looking at him, but Dean could hear the hint of sadness in his voice. His heart leapt into his throat as he realized that one thing about the future he had seen that had been true was Castiel's feelings for him. Dean felt a mixture of joy and terror course through him; joy because Castiel really did care about him, terror that he was now going to have to do something about it and he had no idea what.

"Hey," Dean screwed up every bit of courage he had and reached over to gently touch Castiel's arm, causing the angel to look at him. "Just because Sam's gonna be back doesn't mean we still can't do stuff together. Hell, I enjoyed spending time with you, Cas. I had a lot of fun."

A ghost of a smile touched Castiel's lips. Dean's heart swelled at seeing his angel happy. It only served to remind him just how much he really cared about Castiel and how he would do anything for him.

He had to ask. He couldn't let the opportunity pass.

"So, Cas, I wanted to ask you something," Dean said trying to keep his voice nonchalant.

"Yes, Dean?"

Dean was positive Castiel could hear his heart thundering in his chest. He tightened his grip on the angel's arm, determined not to let him escape once Dean had asked his question.

"Are you in love with me?"

He had meant to be more subtle. He wanted to not have to be so direct. But then, this was Dean Winchester and Dean Winchester was not known for being subtle.

Castiel's eyes widened in shock and Dean could see his cheeks start to flush.

"Wh- what?" Castiel stammered.

Dean leaned in closer knowing that there was no turning back now.

"Are you in love with me?" he repeated slowly. "Because I have reason to believe you are, but I need you to tell me before I go and make a complete jackass out of myself."

Castiel stared at him, a look of panic crossing his face. He tried to pull away, but Dean gripped his arm tighter.

"Don't try to run from this, Cas," Dean said firmly. "Come on, just tell me the truth. It's OK."

Castiel looked fearfully at him and quickly dropped his gaze.

"No," he said quietly. "No, it's not OK."

Dean frowned and moved so he was sitting closer. "What are you talking about? Why isn't it OK?"

Castiel nervously moistened his lips.

"I'm an angel. Angels aren't supposed to have these… emotions."

Dean couldn't help but smile gently.

"Yeah, well, you've already proved you're no ordinary angel."

Castiel shook his head sadly.

"But you don't feel the same way."

Dean's smile broadened despite himself. "Oh yeah? Why do you say that?"

Castiel glanced shyly up at him. "You like women. I've seen you."

It took every ounce of Dean's self control not to start laughing. "Well, yeah, I do like women."

"So anything between us would be impossible."

Dean couldn't take it anymore. He pressed himself along Castiel's side and cupped the angel's chin with his hand, forcing him to turn and look at him.

"Cas, just because I like women doesn't mean I can't love you," Dean said firmly.

Castiel looked hesitantly at him. "It doesn't?"

"No, it doesn't," Dean replied.

Castiel sat there, trying to understand Dean's words. Unable to resist, Dean leaned forward and gently kissed Castiel on the lips. It was a soft, gentle kiss. Dean couldn't help the moan that escaped his throat at the contact with Castiel warm, soft lips though. Kissing Castiel, _his_ Castiel, was far better than he had ever imagined. A feeling of peace flowed through him and pooled in his belly. With a reluctant sigh Dean forced himself to pull away in order to gauge Castiel's reaction.

At first Castiel sat there looking completely stunned and confused. Dean waited a minute, trying to allow Castiel some time to process everything. When he still didn't say anything Dean carefully took his hand.

"Cas? Are you going to say something?"

Castiel nervously moistened his lips before looking at Dean timidly.

"You… you kissed me!"

Dean smiled at the innocent way Castiel said that.

"Yes, I kissed you. Did you like it?"

Castiel averted his gaze for a moment, his cheeks turning an even darker shade of crimson before he finally nodded shyly. Dean smiled broadly.

"Good. You wanna do it again?"

Castiel finally looked at him at that statement. A shy smile tugged the corners of his lips.

"You… you want me to?"

Dean felt like he was on top of the world.

"God, yes!"

Castiel took a deep breath and studied Dean carefully, as if waiting for him to change his mind. Finally, with great trepidation, he leaned forward and awkwardly pressed his lips against Dean's. Despite his obvious lack of experience, Castiel was definitely a willing student. Dean deepened the kiss while reaching one arm around Castiel's waist and the other cupping his face. Castiel mimicked the actions and pressed himself tighter against Dean. A soft purr of arousal came from Castiel's throat, sending a bolt of desire straight to Dean's groin. Finally, Dean forced himself to pull away, gasping for air. Castiel looked at him confused.

"Did I do something wrong?" he asked timidly.

Dean couldn't help smiling warmly at him and shook his head.

"No! No, Cas. Trust me, you're doing everything right! Really _really_ right!" He ran a hand through his short hair and looked hungrily over the angel's body. "But I don't want to push you too far. And… well… you keep that up and I don't know what I'll do!"

Castiel looked at Dean in surprise. He looked down nervously before finally looking back up at Dean.

"I think… I think I want to… do… more…"

_Oh God help me! He's going to kill me! And I'm going straight to Hell. Again._

"Do you know what you want to do?" Dean asked breathlessly, allowing his hands to run up Castiel's arms to his shoulders. He could feel him tremble under his touch.

"What can we do?" Castiel asked his eyes wide and innocent while looking at Dean.

Fifty different ideas flashed through Dean's mind in the span of two seconds. He quickly shoved aside his own personal desires as he knew Castiel wasn't quite ready for any of them.

"How about… we go back to kissing? Would you like that? And we'll just see where it goes."

Castiel's eyes lit up, obviously happy with the suggestion.

"OK."

Dean's allowed himself to begin pushing Castiel's trench coat and suit jacket off somewhat impatiently.

"But first I want you in less clothes. Trust me; it'll be a lot better that way."

Castiel looked at him hesitantly but allowed him to remove his jackets. Seeing the angel in less than the usual amount of clothing only served to fuel Dean's lust. Unable to restrain himself any longer he pulled Castiel into a searing kiss, running his hands eagerly over his chest and unbuttoning the shirt he still had on. Castiel gasped at the onslaught and Dean took the opportunity to slip his tongue into Castiel mouth and taste him. Dean could taste honey and vanilla and it was the most erotic and comforting thing he had ever experienced.

Uncertain at first how to handle Dean's veracity Castiel had meekly sat there and allowed himself to be touched. Now, however, Dean's caresses had begun to stir new sensations in the angel, ones he had never experienced before. He grabbed Dean's t-shirt with both hands and whimpered desperately.

"Take your shoes off and lay down," Dean gasped into Castiel's ear.

Castiel briefly struggled with kicking his shoes off before allowing Dean to pull him further onto the bed and laying him down. Dean leaned over him, drinking in the sight of Castiel's partially undressed form. His self control was rapidly failing and the look of desire in Castiel's eyes wasn't helping.

"Tell me what to do, Dean," Castiel whimpered desperately. "I… it all feels so… strange…"

"Does it feel good?" Dean murmured as he began nuzzling Castiel's neck. His hand traveled down the angel's now exposed chest to his abdomen.

"Yes…"

"Can I take your clothes off?" He had to keep reminding himself to slow down, that this was all new to Castiel. Fortunately, Castiel nodded.

Silently cheering, Dean quickly removed Castiel's clothing down to his boxers. Dean also pulled off his own t-shirt so he was now similarly dressed. He watched Castiel run his gaze over his now nearly-naked form and smiled at how nervous Castiel looked.

"You still OK with this, Cas?" Dean asked quietly, pressing another kiss to the angel's lips.

Castiel drew in a deep breath and nodded. Dean smiled and began kissing Castiel more passionately while allowing his hand to wander over the angel's newly exposed skin. Shoving fabric aside he slipped his hand over the front of Castiel's boxers, wrapping his hand around his growing erection. Castiel let out a strangled cry and bucked helplessly into Dean's hand.

"You like that, Cas?" Dean murmured huskily into Castiel's ear. "Does that feel good?"

Castiel nodded desperately, too overwhelmed to speak. Dean quickly pulled off the boxers as well as his own, leaving them both nude on the bed. He swallowed hard as he took in Castiel's lean form beneath him, his mind racing with thoughts of what he wanted to do to him. He wanted to give Castiel as much pleasure as possible, but he also felt like he was going to explode himself.

Fortunately, Castiel was eager to please as well.

"De- Dean," Castiel gasped. "I want… to touch you…"

Dean quickly took Castiel's hand and guided it over to his own swollen member. He let out a moan of pleasure as Castiel wrapped his hand gently around it. Biting his lower lip, Dean showed Castiel how to stroke him while mimicking the actions on the angel.

Soon they were both lost within the pleasures they were bringing to each other. Castiel moaned and writhed sensually on the bed beneath Dean, his eyes closed as he quickly approached completion. Dean wasn't far behind, his arousal far greater than anything he had ever experienced with anyone else.

Suddenly, Castiel's free hand gripped Dean's arm tightly and his breath became more erratic.

"De-Dean! Dean… I… I think… _DEAN!!!_"

He screamed with pleasure while exploding over Dean's hand. His release was enough to send Dean over the edge and he cried out, coating Castiel with his semen. His arm that was supporting him gave out and he collapsed into a heap by Castiel's side.

They lay there for a few minutes, gasping for air and slowly coming down from their orgasmic high. Dean finally turned his head to look at his angel. Castiel's eyes were still closed, his face flushed and sweaty from their experience. It was the most beautiful sight Dean had ever seen and he reached over to brush a lock of Castiel's damp hair from his face.

"Hey," he murmured softly. "You OK, Cas?"

Castiel slowly opened his eyes and looked at Dean. He nodded weakly.

"Is it always like that?" he asked in wonder.

Dean's smile broadened and he kissed Castiel gently.

"Oh yeah. And there's a lot more we can do to make it even better!"

Castiel's eyes widened. "Better than _that_!?"

Dean smirked and nuzzled Castiel affectionately. "Oh yeah. Don't worry. I promise to show you everything we can do!"

Castiel smiled shyly. "So… we'll do this again?"

Dean pulled back enough to look at Castiel's face. Seeing the nervousness that was still there Dean took Castiel's face with both hands and looked him dead in the eye.

"I have never felt this way about _anyone_, Castiel. I care about you more than I ever thought was humanly possible! So, yes, we will be doing this again. And many times after that because no matter how things turn out, I want to be with you. And I want you to never forget that!"

Castiel smiled at Dean's words, obviously relieved. When he nodded Dean smiled and pulled him into a warm embrace, kissing him tenderly.

He meant every word he had said. He didn't know how things were going to end up. He didn't even know if they would survive the next day. But what he did know was that so long as he had his angel, the Castiel he had come to know and love, it didn't matter. Just so long as they had each other it would all be OK.

_The End_

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Man, that took me forever to write!!! Really hoped it turned out OK!

Thank you all so much for reading and all your reviews. I am so blessed to have such amazing readers and you are all so wonderful and supportive! It's been a rough week, but you have all made it a little better with all your kind words. So thank you again! : )


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